Already my year in Israel feels a bit like a dream. Images fray and I strain to hold on to their threads. Everything is different here: a wide landscape of green and a light rain on a late spring day. Alan and I wandered into a Kmart on Friday and I immediately felt like a visitor to a strange planet I had only heard of in movies. Everything was shiny and there were gadgets to fill needs I never knew I had (a special citrus peeling device that left me muttering, "Couldn't you just use a knife?"). And I feel slightly like an amnesiac returning to my memories. Yesterday, just as I was about to start pumping gas, Alan remembered that the car (my car!) can't be filled all the way up. And, contrary to expectations, my old cell phone has returned to me. Different number, but the little thing is still filled with all the old contacts. It feels heavy with the weight of numbers I forgot I ever had.
I am worried about how to hold on to what was important to me about being in Israel (stay up on the local news there, keep my Hebrew gains). Don't know whether we'll keep this blog going, but it will certainly be a helpful record for me.
Perhaps, from the perspectives of "Israel educational" and "Jewish peoplehood," the comfort of being back in the States is double-edged, but I am unequivocally happy to be here. Spending the weekend in Sag Harbor, I made sure to visit both the ocean and the bay. Soaked up sweet moments with family. And I feel like I am coming home to myself in some important ways.
Meanwhile, I need to find a place to live....